busy

Sorry, it's been a while since I last wrote. It's been kind of busy here..... The days are all rolling into each other. My friends condition is slowly progressing and all my time and effort is directed into keeping him healthy, happy and safe. We made it through spring but it was nearly the end of my sanity, the layer of protection of inclement weather keeping him home was lifted and he became very mobile. When the sun is out he likes to walk. 

Walking is fine when his favourite cafe on the main street of our town is open. It's fine when the town is not over run with tourists during school holidays and there's not an event in that area. But when summer hit we we're barrelling towards moments where I would want to hold my breath.

But it was all ok, initially there was a lot of walking but as the days got warmer he began to stick closer to home. His confusion increased and I'm left wondering if this is what kept him home or if he unconsciously realised it was too hot to walk his precious canine companion. So instead of being the month that I dreaded January actually offered some respite and it continued all the way through to mid April. Now we're back to milder days and he has found his feet again and I find myself praying for rain. 

For a while now I've noted  that there is a time limit to the amount of time he can tolerate being out in the world. It's about 2 hours after that as his brain tires, he gets cranky and confused. He doesn't process the world as he used to and remembering faces and how he knows people as well as making sense of the world around him is tiring. I liken it to starting a new job with so many new things to learn it's tiring even if you are in the same field as before. Remembering names, places procedures can leave you brain tired and ready for bed as soon as your dinner plate hits the sink. 

With the increase in care required it's left little time for me. I've taken a back seat in my own life. I long for a day to myself, a day where I don't have to leave the house. But on the flip side of that it will mean that I've put someone else in the drivers seat and that will be a shift to residential care for my friend. 

The wheels are already in motion for this move, we're slowly edging to the point where staying at home will no longer be safe for my friend.....

Photo by Jeremy Thomas on Unsplash